theworldaccordingtochris

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[14:04] Chris Ling/Meebo :   hey
[14:04] Chris Ling/Meebo : did you get a wii?
[14:05] Matt Dufrasne : I am currently idle.
[14:05] Chris Ling/Meebo : shut up
[14:05] Matt Dufrasne : I am currently idle.
[14:06] Chris Ling/Meebo : bs
[14:06] Matt Dufrasne : I am currently idle.
[14:06] Chris Ling/Meebo : you are not idle
[14:06] Matt Dufrasne : I am currently idle.
[14:06] Chris Ling/Meebo : you just typed that
[14:06] Matt Dufrasne : I am currently idle.
[14:06] Chris Ling/Meebo : like a minute later
[14:06] Chris Ling/Meebo : stop it
[14:06] Matt Dufrasne : I am currently idle.
[14:06] Matt Dufrasne : I am currently idle.
[14:06] Matt Dufrasne : I am currently idle.

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as you may or may not know. i’m trying to eat a little bit every 3 hours…

as part of this plan, i have to change something that is at the very core of who i am.  i must fight the urge to save the best for last.

often, i will save the food i want to eat the most for the last bite and savor it, by eating the filler stuff first…  this can lead to heartbreak when i lose the last bite to the forces of gravity.  yes that is a sad time. but i can’t figure out the fundamental reasoning behind why i do this?  maybe it’s deferred gratification, maybe it’s because meals in the past have been too small?

ideally i’d eat in order of most delicious and then just stop eating when i don’t want to eat anymore, instead of licking the plate clean…

things to ponder…

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mud meatballs and rivers

dirt forts, blanket fan houses, bubbles on the carpet

pigging out on lasagne and watching “lampchops play along”

letting mickey in the house and cleaning the poop and still getting in trouble

selling you fake stickers and having dad make me give you a full refund

tipping you over in a stroller that i made you ride in and giving you a permanent “booger”

here’s to you sister

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still jetlagged…

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at the westin taipei:

me:  hello hotel lobby, is free internet included in the room rate?
hotel:  hold on, let me check
hotel:  no it is not sir, you can pay 250 an hour or…
*swaying*
me:  is the room shaking?
hotel:  yes, it’s an earthquake
me:  …
me:  (thinking i should duck and cover)
me:  is this normal
hotel:  don’t worry, it will be over soon
me:  oh ok, thanks

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red wine and chocolate

life is good

i finished a large toblerone by myself in 3 days.

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i know that stooping to this kind of humor is cheap and maybe even slightly crude.  i don’t care.

the other day we were playing poker, and there was this horrible
smell.  fingers went flying, everyone denied it.  to this
day, the perp. still remains at large.  probably fled the country
after hearing we have a war on “terror” for what happened that night was mass destruction of life.

all that is left besides the trail of destruction, is a series of clues
and it is my aim in this post to put the pieces together.

let’s put our faith in the scientific method and reason to deduce who dealt it

we will call time of emission t = 0

at t + 3 seconds, shane experienced the blast.  this was the first mention of the atrocity.

at t + 7, i smelled what at first seemed like egg salad, but quickly soured into china town street smell

assuming the diffusion rate of the gas molecules in air is constant
and that the specific heat of julie’s butt = nasty, we can draw radius
lines from shane and myself and find where the circles intersect.
see fig. 1

one thing to question…  why erica never said anything.  we
must postulate that she was julie’s partner in crime.

further more, if the perp was one of the dudes, we would have gladly taken the fall.

which leads us to my point.  julie farted

elementary my dear fartson

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the other day i was driving behind an older looking gentleman in a mercedes s500.  the license plate read “staywme”.

heh, i dont think it worked

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looks are relative, if you think someone is hot, you’re really thinking they are hotter than you, if you think someone is ugly, you’re really thinking they are uglier than you.  so if you walk around and think the general public is ugly, you’re probably pretty handsome.  the converse is that if you think everyone is hot, you’re probably not.

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